I wrote a little on Instagram about being without Hayden. We’ve been pretty inseperable the 4 ish years we’ve known each other, even when he went on tour he was never that far away. I knew exactly when he was coming home. But with the Lockdown uncertainty is everyones play mate right now. I’m not enjoying it at all. My mood is low, lots of things annoy me. I’m sleeping all the time, but am always tired. I’m filling my time. Creating photos for The Curly Haired Girl and for Instagram, working on my island on Animal Crossing, painting, doing workouts I find online. Anything to pass the time. Any time I stop i feel a wave of tears come to the surface. I’m sure it’s not depression or saddness but more a lack of control. I have not control over what I eat everyday, how I spend my days, I can’t go anywhere, I’ve not even driven in over 2 weeks. I’m someone we enjoys being independent, being able to come and go as I please. I like a routine I set myself.
Just Bunny and I laying in bed thinking about shit and getting philosophical together.
DRESS – H&M | BUNNY -TY
Meet Bunny, my childhood companion. I’ve never gendered Bunny so can’t really say “he” means a lot to me, or “she” got me through some interesting times. Bunny is just Bunny. Bunny used to have a voice (thanks mum) but over the years Bunny has become silent but in some ways has spoken to me more.
Inspired to be more creative inside as I try and keep myself (asthmatic) and my mother (parkinson’s) as safe as possible. I saw a photo on Instagram of a lady lying on the edge of the bed with a bear next to her. The concept really interested me and I wanted to recreate it with Bunny. I also wish in some way that Bunny was actually Hayden. I miss him so much at the moment. We are making efforts to keep everyone safe and reducing the amount of time we spend with each other. It’s hard. If we lived together right now it would be fine but keeping a distance from your love is difficult. I did see Hayden through the porch door this afternoon. Congratulating him on finishing his first placement.